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Saabturn -- funniest thing I've read this morning
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Posted by Nigel (more from Nigel) on Mon, 8 Jan 2001 08:29:55 Share Post by Email
In Reply to: Here's what will happen with GM, Larry, Fri, 5 Jan 2001 14:12:02
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That was a riot. Here's my prediction: They'll come out with a kick-ass variable compression engine, heads-up display, possibly AWD from the Subaru. The car will have some of the most advanced technology on the face of the earth.

Unfortunately, the car will be saddled with "MagnaStEEr-EEiX", just like the old MagnaSteer system only less responsive, heavier, more numb, and more expensive. The car will understeer like my grandmother's walker. The interior will look like a Tonka toy factory after a flood. Oh, and it will weigh 6500 lbs and have little "ABS!!" stickers on the wheels and trunk.

The baboons at GM just LOVE bolting unnecessary high-tech equipment to poorly designed cars and calling them "advanced". I'll tell you something. A nuts-and-bolts, stripped-down 323 with vinyl seats and a typically crappy German electronics systems is lightyears ahead of any car GM has ever built, with the possibility of the NG Corvette.

If I ran GM, I'd issue this directive: You are NOT allowed to research or develop a SINGLE new component until you learn how to built a car that handles approximately as well as a BMW. No MagnaSteer. No OnStar. No heads-up-display. No nightvision. No active handling. Nothing. Learn something about basic suspension design and THEN worry those things.

The phrase "pearls before swine" comes to mind. Nightvision is a pearl, a terrific bit of technology that could save lives. You know what else is? DECENT BRAKES!!! COMPETENT HANDLING!!! ACCURATE STEERING!!!!! Those things save lives too.

I sincerely hope Kirk Kerkorian or Roger Penske take this 19th-century relic and do something useful with it.

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