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Yes, you can be surprised that they used you as a reference. But from your description, it was pretty obvious that 'they didn't get it.' So why assume that they suddenly got smart? If they were smart enough to figure out you'd be a poor reference for them, they probably wouldn't have screwed up in the first place.
Agree with the others - If at all possible, refer the person to HR and SAY NOTHING. If you normally provide info like employment dates, do that and NOTHING MORE. Yes, it would be tempting to say what you think. But this person has already demonstrated a willingness to stir things up if she doesn't like the outcome. If you say anything, she could, and from the sound of it, would, take you and your company to court. Sure beats working. That's why I would refer them straight to HR. That way, if you are deposed/brought to court, you can say "I just refered them to HR." If you say ANYTHING else, even something innocuous, it becomes a he said/she said issue on a conversation not documented. Did you 'imply' something? Prove it, or more importantly, prove you didn't say it.
You aren't paranoid if people really are out to get you. In business, I have seen some pretty nasty things happen when somebody decides they've been done wrong. As much as you may feel for this new employer, it's not yours to say. For all you know, she will work out great for him. Just don't get involved.
When called unsolicited, I always refer the person to HR, and say that it is company policy that I do not comment on any reference.
For folks that I do provide references, I provide a letter indicating that I am doing this as a person, and not a representative of my company, and that these are my opinions. And I'm frugal with my references.
posted by 192.249....
Posts in this Thread:
- Ethical question--reference for employment ..., Urby, Thu, 24 Feb 2005 08:01:17
- Easy solution, Rafe, Fri, 25 Feb 2005 16:34:27
- Similar thing happened to me, NonStop
, Fri, 25 Feb 2005 13:43:26 - Are we talking work history or referrence?, JimN, Fri, 25 Feb 2005 08:49:33
- Re: Ethical question--reference for employment ..., TML
, Fri, 25 Feb 2005 07:34:16 - "Weekend nocturnal epilepsy" - Google hits = 0, Geoff, Thu, 24 Feb 2005 13:44:50
- And the plot thickens ..., Urby, Thu, 24 Feb 2005 10:30:54
- legal issue, Rich, Thu, 24 Feb 2005 10:25:16
- Tell it like it is...., CFishgo, Thu, 24 Feb 2005 10:12:03
- I found this whole thread incredibly sad..., LesH, Thu, 24 Feb 2005 09:34:55
- If HR won't handle it, say as little as possible..., Noel, Thu, 24 Feb 2005 09:19:42
- Make no recommendation, pro or con, Ari
, Thu, 24 Feb 2005 08:48:46 <-- Viewing This Message - Agree w/ AlexF, SilverAeroGuy, Thu, 24 Feb 2005 08:24:33
- "asking for trouble if you tell the truth", Urby, Thu, 24 Feb 2005 08:41:19
- Re: I think Urby should say regard to her work and, t_mokes, Thu, 24 Feb 2005 09:14:27
- Re: "asking for trouble if you tell the truth", Yaofeng, Thu, 24 Feb 2005 08:55:23
- Yes, check with HR and let HR handles this. n/m, TKC, Thu, 24 Feb 2005 08:51:54
- Just refer the caller to HR, many companies do not...., TKC, Thu, 24 Feb 2005 08:12:21
- Say as little as possible, AlexF, Thu, 24 Feb 2005 08:09:54
- Re: Ethical question--reference for employment ..., t_mokes, Thu, 24 Feb 2005 08:09:42
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